To Be Around Derek Wu
MUN interviews tend to stray away from the outright solemn atmosphere normal interviews usually hold; they do so by throwing in random, out-of-the-box questions. The people who hire the conference’s staff members say that they ask such kinds of questions to test the applicant’s creativity and quick-wittedness, but they’re not the real reason why. They just want to fuck with your head.
Here are some of the ones I’ve been hurled at:
“Can you explain to me what terrorism is as if I’m a five-year-old?”
“Why don’t you tell me a joke?”
“How many cows are there in Canada? How can you calculate the number of cows in the country?”
Those questions were certainly memorable, but this one takes the cake for me:
“If you were Nelson Madela, would you be a good dentist?”
Derek Wu asked me that question during my interview for a staffing position at Vancouver Model United Nations (VMUN). If I’m not mistaken, my answer was something along the lines of...
“If you can free someone from bad breath, then I think you can free the people of South Africa from oppression.”
I don’t want to toot my own horn or anything, but that was hilarious.
But between Derek’s question and my answer was a series of stuttering sounds, stumbling on every word as I wondered why the fuck they’re asking me about my hypothetical capabilities as a South African who dabbles in teeth science.
The question, however, is not as baffling as the inspiration behind it. Derek blames the oddity on the admissions offices of the University of Chicago. To borrow the university’s own words, UChicago is famous (or perhaps infamous) for the “provocative essay questions” they pose to those who want to study there. To refer to the University’s description of their unique essay prompts:
“We think of them as an opportunity for students to tell us about themselves, their tastes, and their ambitions. They can be approached with utter seriousness, complete fancy, or something in between.
Each year we email newly admitted and current College students and ask them for essay topics. We receive several hundred responses, many of which are eloquent, intriguing, or downright wacky.”
Derek, whose line of inquiry was influenced by UChicago prompts such as…
“What’s so odd about odd numbers?”
“So where is Waldo, really?”
“Find x,”
…was determined to put the people he was interviewing through mental torture.
“I was just trying to put myself in the shoes of one of the people who make those questions and just think of how wacky I can get with them,” Derek said. “Just make it so weird but also something people can somehow be able to understand.”
Speaking of “wacky”, I must say: Derek is one “wacky” person. When you remove the sophisticated activities he participated in during high school (which includes MUN) and the high-brow status that came with studying at a prestigious private school, what you’re left with is a guy who has a specific set of interests and ideas many people would consider weird. It’s not the kind of weirdness that will tempt you to call the police. His weirdness is more so whimsical and chuckle-worthy.
For instance, Derek Wu loves bread, but not in an acceptable way. In several posts he made on MUN staff members-only Facebook pages, he has stated that he can be found…
“…searching for the best bread and pastries at Vancouver’s finest bakeries”,
“pondering over which Vancouver bakeries have the best almond croissant,”
“daydreaming about baked goods”,
or even “thinking about almond croissants”.
He told me he ate bread the morning of our interview, which only presented me with the opportunity to ask him how he prepared it. “The one I had this morning was like this raisin loaf thing, but you get it sliced and you gotta toast it a little bit with butter. What you can do is either put it with more jam or I put cream cheese on it. That’s what I usually do.” What a rather overly meticulous way of preparing bread.
Give the man a Michelin star!
Get yourself a man who’ll look at you the same way Derek looked at his bread and cheese.
When I pressed him on his rather unusual relationship with bread, his response only displayed his complete subservience to bakeries. “I love bread,” Derek proclaimed, “and I’ve always said that if you want to bribe me, you can do it with bread.”
So for anyone who wishes to get the upper hand against Derek in any situation, I suppose Wonder Bread would be the quickest (and cheapest) answer.
But if you want to make Derek your serf, give him an almond croissant. He'll set himself on fire for you if you serve him one. “It’s perfect. It’s sweet, but it’s not chocolate where it’s kind of overbearingly sweet. It has a nuttiness to it. And if it’s a good croissant, you got the nice texture of the layers and crunch, you know?”
His fascination with bread could be evidence that supports the claim that he’s “old”. Some grandmothers like to knit; old men are down at the OTB (off-track betting). Meanwhile, Derek’s fondling bread.
Derek, at the time of the interview, was 18 — which is by no means “old” age. What makes him “old” is the way he presents himself. “I make these very strange sounds,” he confessed. “Like when I’m getting up or something, I’m like ‘Ugh, my back!’” The reason why he’s making those sounds, he assumed, is that the fact that he’s “not in very good shape” and that he’s “mentally tired”; but even then, no 18-year-old is involuntarily moaning when he’s going down the stairs.
I have to be careful in portraying Derek as some kind of strange individual, however. If you’re even at least an inch deeper into his life story, then you’ll see the meritorious honour that compliments the oddities.
When you do get an inch deeper, you’ll get to witness his enchantment with history. Derek is studying History and Politics at the University of Edinburgh. He’s completely enraptured by European history; at the time of interviewing Derek, he said that he was extensively reading about the Lusosphere (a group of nations that was once colonized by the Portuguese empire.) I’m more of an American politics reader, so I can’t say I’m interested in reading about Angola.
But regardless of what part of the world he’s studying, what is more compelling is the reason why he reads history. “I guess a lot of history is just being able to see what makes people, cultures and communities stay how they are,” Derek said.
He then described his observation of how the past shaped the nation of Taiwan, which is where his family came from. “Growing up as Taiwanese and seeing all of the Taiwanese culture and stuff and knowing the history of Taiwan as a Japanese colony, you can see the influence of Japanese culture in Taiwan.”
He argued that you can see how both Japanese and Taiwanese values merged into a unique set of principles that the Taiwanese people today have inherited. “You know how the Japanese have this sort of stereotype of being these very orderly people? I think they are, and I think a lot of that came across in Taiwan. Even just the norms of how you treat your elders, a lot of that just comes from history.”
This is Derek before the impeding doom called ‘aging.’
Being able to recognize how outside forces can impact what one is (and can become) is part of the beauty of history. It must be noted, however, that not every impact has been beneficial for society. “I went to this pizza place in Taiwan,” Derek recalled, “and you know how pizza has the ham, salami, pepperoni or whatever? They put honey on it.” He said that they paired the honey with “some white cream sauce.”
When I asked why they put honey on pizza, I got a resounding “I don’t know.” “I thought it was weird,” he said. “I tried it and I just don’t like it…I’m not a fan.”
But aside from the horrific white sauce-honey pizza combination, Derek is certainly proud of his Taiwanese heritage and the culture sounding him. He comes from a long line of individuals who’ve proudly waved Taiwan’s flag for generations. His grandfather back in Taiwan is involved with the DPP (Democratic Progressive Party), advocating for Taiwanese independence. His father helps organize Vancouver’s TaiwanFest and appears regularly on TV to discuss Taiwanese culture and society.
His family’s unwavering connection with Taiwan moulded his world viewpoint, which includes his opinion on Taiwanese independence from the People’s Republic of China. “I guess growing up around people who are so cognizant and who care a lot about that sort of Taiwanese identity and that culture of it allowed me to see just sort of what makes us distinct and what makes us different from China. Just all of the little quirks and the things that you encounter in Taiwan, you won’t see that in China.”
Knowing how treacherous the conversation revolving around topics like the Taiwanese independence movement can be, discussing it during the interview was somewhat like walking on the most delicate eggshells.
Derek can certainly understand the difficulty of talking about Taiwan’s politics, which is why he steers clear from it. “I honestly try to avoid those conversations as much as I can,” he said. “It’s a complicated scenario to talk about it. People are gonna have different understandings of things because of different backgrounds and upbringings. I think the way I would approach it is to be cognizant of the different backgrounds we might have and how that shaped our beliefs now. I think that’s honestly the only way you can do it and the easiest way to keep things civil.”
To him, it’s too easy to define someone with just one thorn in their rose. “It can be tempting sometimes to tie someone together to their politics and make that a way of understanding who they are and how they see the world. In a lot of cases, it’s not someone you agree with,” Derek told me. “That can lead you directly towards this very negative outlook. So I just think [it’s better] if we try and keep that away instead of focusing on those divisive issues.”
This more pacific attitude towards conflict speaks to his Canadian side, which is one he’s more comfortable identifying with. “Well, frankly, I haven’t spent enough time in Taiwan to say I am more Taiwanese than Canadian. I think the Taiwanese part of me is a strong part of my identity and sort of cultural background. But I think just growing up in Canada, which is very accepting to people of different backgrounds, that quality of acceptance and being able to be Canadian no matter what you are...is something that easily allows me to feel Canadian.”
Anyone will be smitten by Derek knowing who he is and being at peace with things about him that may seem somewhat unfavourable. Case in point: Derek’s response to the “accusations of being old.” His friends, when given the opportunity, will point out his senior tendencies, calling him a “father figure” and a “boomer”, or portraying him as a forgetful 56-year-old or someone who “gives off grandpa vibes.” Despite being presented as merely playful jabs, Derek is more than willing to seriously analyze them.
In this photo, Derek’s eating A&W with his two grandchildren, William and Tyler.
After much thought into the accusations of him being old, he came to the conclusion that they’re neither compliments nor insults. What he can say for certain is that they’re true. “I think there are things that make me have that kind of vibe,” Derek acknowledged. He realized that it was sometimes a “point of insecurity,” but he doesn’t see it in the harshest light.
In actuality, he admitted that he has embraced the label himself. “You know what? Sometimes, I would take it as a compliment. I think it’s some kind of maturity or insightfulness. I don’t want to sound like I’m self-praising, but I would say that when people say that, it’s just a reflection that maybe I do have a bit more of that old soul. I think [the jokes] are an extension of [the reflection]. I guess it can be a good thing.”
People may see him as an “old soul” when they notice Derek’s efforts to usher in the talents of those younger than him. During his time at St. George’s School, he took the helm in being a guide for the younger students who want to follow in his footsteps ─ having protégés of his own. When I asked him how he wants to be remembered, he said that he wants to be remembered as a mentor. “That’s really important to me...and being someone who is very active in trying to help out.”
Looking forward, he hopes to apply both his aspiration to be some form of a mentor and his affinity for history into his future career. “I found myself that I really like teaching,” Derek said. He thinks that calling is his teaching, but the uncertainty in his voice told me that he wasn’t ready to have it all set in stone.
Professor Derek Wu during a spa day.
“But I’ve enjoyed [teaching] a lot. Just being in clubs, helping around with the Grade 8s and 9s. I’ve learned a lot from that experience...I try to at least be someone who’s more approachable to the younger kids...just seeing how they’re able to grow and succeed. It’s a great feeling to have when you see someone who you’ve been working with and you’ve been trying to at least be some kind of mentor to them go places. So yeah, I’m proud of that. And that sort of feeling probably pushed me towards teaching.”
“I probably sound like a grandpa right about now,” Derek reckoned.
Recommended Song: To Be Around You - Mariah Carey