Oliver Gao and Mikael Borres Suffer From RBF
I’ll let you be the judge of whether he’s got RBF or not. The picture above is Exhibit A.
It is with a heavy heart to report to you, the reader, that I suffer from R.B.F., which is short for resting bitch face.
To precisely explain by borrowing the words of Urban Dictionary user jennasea, one uses the term when a person’s face makes them “look like a huge bitch!” It’s a short explanation, yet it’s concise to the point of immediate understanding.
There is no sure-fire way for me to explain why I have R.B.F. nor is there a way to trace the triggering factor behind my facial predicament. Perhaps it is a genetic matter, which makes the most sense considering the spitefulness portrayed on my parents’ faces. But other than that possibility, I can’t say that I have any more to bring up to expound on the state of my bitter beauty. I’ll let the scientists, the scholars, and the swindling plastic surgeons figure it all out.
Living with R.B.F. comes with the territory of annoying inquiry. Despite feeling fine, it seems as though my neutral expression causes concern for some people who may be looking at me, asking why my face is a physical presentation of the Great Depression. Even Google and Safari have shared their worries; through their advertising algorithms, they’re either showing me banners of counselling services or Prozac. What fun.
Oliver Gao, who also suffers from ‘resting bitch face’, shared a similar agony to me. “People often tell me that their first impression of me is that I’m very serious and almost mad,” Oliver me. Although his best guess is the fact that he has a resting bitch face, his guess is as good as anyone else’s.
“That would probably be the misconception [about me] because I would really hate for people to not get to know me or not even attempt to speak to me because they feel intimidated by just looking at me.”
But in fairness to those who find him scary, the claim that he looks intimidating is true. In fact, I would like to second their motion to recognize the natural smugness displayed on Oliver’s face.
The natural display of smugness is so clear to everyone, including Oliver himself. “I was, I think, at some school event. I was kind of nervous and I got a bit reserved, and I guess that set off the face. And then, I went to the bathroom. I went to the mirror and subconsciously relaxed. In relaxing, I saw, in the mirror, how much my face changed. So I was like, ‘Holy shit. This is how I actually look like when people first see me.’”
Here’s Exhibit B.
Even if Oliver didn’t notice it, people were more than happy to point it out for him. Back when he was still in high school, he liked to take naps at lunch and would lay his head on the table when resting. “People just come by and think that I’m crying or something. I wake up with my normal face, and they’re asking me if I’m okay.”
…and finally, Exhibit C.
There are ways to curb the expression like training your eyebrows to be raised higher at all times or putting your tongue to the roof of your mouth, but those methods just seem to be too much of a hassle for Oliver. The only remedy that has been worthwhile for him is talking to people, proving through speech that he’s not upset at all. But even then, it’s still going to be an issue. At this point, Oliver doesn’t seem to mind. “I figured that if [R.B.F.] is something that comes with me, then there’s no use in trying to change it. It’s a part of who I am.”
Recommended Song: Resting Bitch Face - Boy George and Culture Club